Brilliant Dawn
by Topaz Fireheart Storm
Summary: Edward came back sooner in New Moon. My version of what I would have wanted to happen in New Moon. Lots of fluff, T because I'm still paranoid. R&R please, I'm desperate.
1. Chapter 1

I knew that I had to see her. I had to see if she had moved on. It had only been three months, but I couldn't stay away any longer. Everything had crashed to the ground only minutes after I had left her, but would she feel the same? Or would she still be hurt?

I knew that I didn't have any right to come near her again. Not her, Bella, the one mystery in my never-ending existence. But I would go back. She would never see me, and I would leave after I had checked on her. Although it had only been three months, I was positive that she had moved on. That she had realized her mistakes when she declared her love for me, and moved on to someone who deserved her.

I got in my car, and started it, only pausing to look at the caller ID on my phone. Alice, of course. I ignored it, and turned onto the nearest road, hitting 120 mph within a few seconds. I drove until the car was running on fumes, then stopped at the nearest gas station to fill up. Someone that obviously worked at convenient store stopped me before I could get in my car again and speed off.

"Aren't you going to get something?" the teenager asked. "I'm in a hurry." I snapped, and got in my car. "Runnin' from the law?" he asked through my open window. "No." I hit the gas and sped out of the convenient store parking lot, going as fast as my car would take me.

It took three hours to get to Washington, and another hour to get to Port Angeles. I only stopped twice more for gas and once to throw my cell phone in the river. Alice had been calling every few minutes the whole time by then, I couldn't take it. When I was in Port Angeles, I stopped and parked on the curb to think. I couldn't back out of this now, but I was nervous. What if I couldn't stay away? If I couldn't, would she be so angry with me for not keeping my promise to stay away?

Soon, I shook my head and started to drive toward Forks. It was late; most likely, Bella would be asleep, but I could stay until she woke up, and watch her from the forest.

I got to Forks and drove to a clearing that would effectively hide my car from view. Once I had parked and locked the car, I stuffed the keys into my pocket and took off running. It took me two minutes to get to Bella's house, and I scaled the wall, hanging on the outside of the window to watch Bella. She wasn't asleep.

Her window was open, so I could hear everything very clearly. Bella was sitting up, sobbing uncontrollably and whispering my name. I could see her wrapping her arms around herself tightly, gasping. I recognized this position as one that I'd been in frequently ever since I had left. She was trying to hold herself together, trying not to fall to pieces.

I felt a sob work it's way up my throat, and I was powerless to stop it. Bella's eyes flashed up to the window where I was hanging when the sound escaped me. I looked at her, and winced, another sob broke from my lips at her appearance. Her eyes were lifeless, her cheeks sunken, her once glowing skin was sickeningly pale and sallow. But she was still beautiful in my eyes. She was merely a broken angel, broken because of me.

"Edward." She murmured. Then, she blinked, and fainted. I climbed into her window and stood by her bed, touching her cheek. My cold touch made her stir. It took another few moments before she was awake. When she was finally wholly awake, she sat up and scooted away from me, to the other edge of the bed.

"He's not here." She told herself, but I shook my head. "I'm here Bella." I said, and touched her cheek to prove my point. She flinched, but didn't draw away. I felt the tears on her cheeks, and the dried salt there. "Bella," I cried softly. "What have I done?" She just continued to stare at me.

"I have no right to be here, I know, but I couldn't stay away any longer." I sat on the edge of the bed, sitting my hands in my lap. She whimpered slightly from the loss of contact, but I ignored that and went on. "I know that I left you." I took in a sharp breath at that, and her eyes went blank for a moment, before she cried out, quite loudly, and wrapped her arms around herself yet again. I figured that her scream was routine to Charlie, as he did not appear to check on her.

I knew that she had been seeing the day that I left again. I knew that it was most likely burned into her memory. I had always known that Bella was different. Why couldn't I see that she would remember everything clearly? I wanted so badly to reach out and comfort her, but I no longer had that right. She was no longer mine, unless she wished to be. However, I would always belong to her, my heart would always be in her hands.

Deciding that she would calm down soon, I went on. "I left you to protect you, Bella." I took a deep breath. "When I had to stop Jasper, my _brother_, from attacking you, I knew that we could no longer stay with you. My family and I fought for days before I left—worse even than when I first met you. They all tried to convince me that I was stupid, but I had been dead set at the time. I was so convinced that leaving was the only way to keep you safe, that I did not think about what it might actually do to you.

"I came here to see if you had moved on. But now, when I see you as you are, I come to beg your forgiveness." I knew that she would probably never forgive me, but some small part of me hoped. For a moment, we simply looked at each other.

"Edward," Bella breathed my name, sending electricity through my veins. "I…. I forgive you, but…," she paused, fright entering her eyes. "I….," she couldn't choke anything out. Ever so slowly, I reached out and touched her face. She scooted closer, wanting my touch. I pulled her into my arms, and heard her sigh slightly, then murmur something that was even inaudible to my ears. "What did you say?" I asked quietly. "It's….nice…to be in your arms again." She whispered, fearing my response. Suddenly elated, I squeezed her tighter, and breathed my next words into her ear. "I love you." Those simple words sent her heart flying. "And this time, I mean it entirely, I promise. I always have loved you. I was just so dead set in my idea that you were safer without me, that I didn't think clearly." I added, stroking her arm.

"I believe you…." Bella breathed, then tensed. "And I forgive you….But Charlie…he…well, he won't be so happy…that your back." I tensed up a bit at her words, and knew that she was correct. "I know." I said gently, and turned her around in my arms. "But I will always be with you now, even if I have to get past a restraining order." I smiled a bit at the end, and she giggled softly. I leaned toward her slightly, and felt her go rigid. I looked into her eyes, and leaned toward her ear to whisper in it.

"Can I kiss you?" I felt foolish asking, but I didn't know if she was ready for that kind of contact again. She nodded ever so slightly, and I brought her face to mine again. Pressing my lips against hers tenderly, I tried to show her my love, prove to her that I belonged to her in that one, sweet kiss. She relaxed into me after a few seconds, becoming like putty in my hands. After several moments, I pulled away, and rested my forehead against hers. I looked at the clock out of the corner of my eye; three a.m. Ever so carefully, I shifted, to let her lie down. We separated for a brief moment, and Bella whimpered softly. I wrapped her in my arms again, not bothering to cover her in the blanket, and kissed her forehead.

"Sleep, my angel. I will be here when you wake." I promised in her ear, and started to hum her lullaby to her. I felt her relax further into me, and heard her breathing slow and even out. She was asleep. I dared not move, for fear of waking her, and for fear that she would disappear from my sight if I let go. "Edward, I love you." She murmured in her sleep, sending an electric shock through me yet again.

"I love you, too, my angel, my Bella." I whispered.


	2. Chapter 2

**

* * *

**

Disclaimer: If you think that I wrote Twilight, New Moon and Eclipse, someone is soon going to send you to a mental asylum and chain you to a bed.

I was awake, but I couldn't get my eyelids to open. I had had a wonderful dream last night, and the fact that it was only a dream made the hole in my chest burn. I opened my eyes, and suddenly felt cold. I shivered, and heard a slight rustle from the sheets, then felt a pressure being taken away from my side. "Are you cold?" Edward's voice asked, and suddenly everything hit me.

The last night, Edward's apology, his declaration of love. I looked at the angel beside me and caught my breath. He smiled slightly, but made no move closer to me. I scooted closer and he opened his arms for me, much like he had the first morning that he had come here, when we had first started out. I smiled at the memory, and felt his lips at my hair. "What is making you so happy?" he asked. "Besides the obvious," he added. "I was remembering the first time that you stayed through the night here—with my permission." I answered, and Edward laughed. "One of my best memories…. You told me, very clearly, that you loved me…. Even if it was in your sleep." I smiled wider, and turned my head slightly, capturing his lips with mine.

"I'm so glad you're back." I said when he pulled away gently. He smiled, then turned and set me on my feet. "You need a human minute, and food." His smile disappeared as he looked over my unusually thin body. I felt the blush creep up my neck into my cheeks, and I hurried to find clothes—a bad idea with my balance. I tripped over my own foot and waited for the impact of the floor, but it never came. I felt Edward's cool arms around me, then his lips at my ear. "Careful, my sweet Bella. I just got you back. I don't want to lose you." He whispered, then steadied me again, turning me to face him and handing me some clothes.

Amazingly, the blush never reached my face. I kissed him softly, then made my way to the bathroom, slowly. I reached the bathroom and closed the door behind me, turning to lean against it. I let out a happy sigh before straightening up and getting the water started.

I thought about the quick way things had happened while the water warmed up. Last night, I'd woken up from one of my frequent nightmares, and heard a sob. When I'd looked up, I decided that I had finally snapped, that Charlie would just cart me off to the mental asylum. But then he'd sobbed again, and I'd whispered his name, passing out before I could confirm my suspicion that I had finally gone mad. When I'd woken, he was still there, and I had still thought that I was hallucinating. But after a few moments of listening to him, I realized that it was real.

And then I'd fallen asleep in his strong arms, like I had every night before these excruciating months apart. Suddenly, I snapped out of my reverie, not being able to see into the mirror anymore because of the steam fogging it up. I jumped a bit, then hurried to get into the shower.

* * *

After Bella had entered the bathroom, I'd sat on my hands to keep from fidgeting. It was agonizing to be away from my angel for mere seconds now, and I could not remember how I'd had the willpower to be away for days on hunting trips. It was quiet except for the soft sounds of the shower hitting the tile for a long moment. Immediately, my mind jumped to the worst. What if Bella had been hurt and I hadn't noticed in my edgy state? I was about to check on her when I heard movements. I heard the distinctive difference between the water hitting the tile and the water hitting her skin and relaxed.

I went back to my thoughts and suddenly realized that they were a dangerous area. When I had come back to Bella, I had had more…physical thoughts about her. I had always thought this way, but the thoughts had intensified into a direct longing for Bella. I knew that I couldn't be with her in that way unless she was changed, and that wasn't happening soon, if at all. I still cringed when the mental image of Bella as a monster, like me, invaded my mind. But I knew that it wasn't true, because no matter what happened to her, Bella couldn't truly be a monster. Then again, I still wouldn't risk her soul, her precious, pure soul. I could think of a million reasons why I shouldn't change her, but I could think of a million more reasons _to_ change her.

The top of the list of reasons to change her would be that she would be mine for eternity…if she would still want that when she was actually changed and there was no turning back. The top of the reasons not the change her was that I didn't want to ruin he chance at Heaven—a place that I would never see.

But I _was _selfish. I wanted to have Bella forever, I wanted to know that she was mine. There were things that we could do if she was turned, that we couldn't do now, and there were things that I could share with her that I couldn't share now. I was waging an internal battle with myself, not knowing which side would win in the end.

Suddenly, the bedroom door opened to reveal my beautiful Bella with wet hair and a glowing face. I shook my head a bit, dazed, and saw her smile widen. I motioned for her to sit next to me, and she complied, sitting next to me on the bed and snuggling closer to my side. I noticed the brush in her hand, and had an idea.

I took the brush from her hands carefully, and scooted a few inches away from her wonderfully warm body. I heard her small whimper, and whispered in her ear to comfort her. "I only want to comb your hair, my love." I said, and felt her shiver. I smiled, and kissed her cheek before backing away a bit more and running the brush through her damp hair. It was oddly satisfying, combing her hair for her. She let her head fall back as I combed gently through her long tresses.

"You've been around Alice too long." She mumbled. "And why would you think that?" I asked, not pausing in my work. "Because you can do this perfectly. Of course, you could always do everything perfectly…," she trailed off, blushing slightly. I chuckled, and reached up to stroke her cheeks with my free hand.

"Do you want breakfast?" I whispered in her ear when I had finished with her hair. "Sure." She said, sounding less than excited. "Well," I started, a stern edge to my voice. "Whether you're hungry or not, you need to eat. You look half dead." I picked her up easily and started downstairs. "Fine." She muttered, unhappy.

"Like I said earlier, I just got you back, I don't want to lose you again." I murmured in her ear as I sat her on a chair. "Have you looked in a mirror lately? You're a very thin stick, and I've never seen you look more fragile." I asked as I grabbed a bowl and a cereal box. I set them on the counter, and went to the refrigerator for the milk—which I could smell from where I was, and I was already feeling a little sick—and grabbed a spoon afterward. I set it all on the table and fixed it for her, putting the bowl in front of her. "Eat, Bella." I said, handing her the spoon. She looked up at me, a defiant expression on her face.

"Do I have to feed you myself?" I asked in her ear, shocking her. I put my hands over hers. "I really will feed you, if it'll get you to eat, Bella." I said honestly. I really wanted Bella to eat. It frightened me to see her this thin, and I didn't like it. I wanted the Bella that had literally stumbled into my life back.

"I would've thought you'd like the change, I was fat enough before, but fine." She muttered, stunning me. Astonishment quickly turned into anger, though.

"You were perfect before Bella, and you always will be. Starving yourself isn't an option. You weren't fat, ever. I loved your body the way it was, and I'll do everything I can to get it that way again—and keep it that way." I growled. She just looked at me. After a moment of silence, I picked up the spoon and held it up. "Either open your mouth or eat on your own." I said, my tone telling her that she wasn't going to get an argument. She rolled her eyes and took the spoon from me, sticking it in her mouth and chewing slowly. She swallowed and looked at me. "Happy?" she asked as she brought the spoon up again.

"Very." I said in her ear, sliding my fingers down her arm. She shivered, and I smiled. "I love you." I murmured, kissing her cheek. While she ate, I thought of our months apart, and my decision. I thought about my reasons, too, and the lines from a musical entered my thoughts, almost making me scowl. _Helpless, unforgiving, cold and driven to this sad conclusion….No beauty could move me, no goodness improve me, no power on Earth, if I can't love her…_

Beauty and the Beast indeed. Bella, the beautiful angel that did nothing to deserve my darkness, and I, the soulless beast.

But she didn't see it like that. She saw me as an angel, and saw herself as the beast, bringing me down. I would forever be trying to convince her otherwise, but she is very stubborn, and I doubted that even I could be that patient. Yet another line from the musical popped into my head, and I was struck with the similarity. _If I can't love her, let the world be done with me._

"Edward?" Bella asked. I snapped out of my reverie and smiled at her. "What were you thinking about?" she asked, smiling. I knew why—it was usually me who asked her that. "How I shouldn't deserve an angel like you." I whispered, afraid of her reaction. For a moment, she just sat and stared at me. I looked down, embarrassed, and felt her move.

Her finger was under my chin, coaxing my face up. "You've got that backwards." She muttered before pressing her lips to mine. Almost immediately, my mind clouded and I lost track of time. She thought that _I_ dazzled _her_….

After several moments, I could tell she was getting lightheaded, so I pulled away softly and lifted onto my lap. She rested her head against my chest and tried to catch her breath.

"Edward?" Bella asked quietly after a moment. "Yes?" I replied. She seemed nervous.

* * *

I was a little nervous about this, but I knew that we would probably dwell on it forever if I didn't bring it up. "I think we need to talk about the time we spent apart."

**Okay, so if this sounds out of it and OOC, please tell me, I was trying to hold onto my sanity with my cousins screaming in my ear while I wrote it. At least I got it out though...Believe me, if you had been in the car at that time, you wouldn't want to hear Hotel California for a long time...if anyone knows what that is...yeah, okay, just please leave a review about what you think!**


	3. Poll AN

This isn't a chapter, sorry!

Okay. I have a poll going on my profile. It's to decide which story I am going to focus on. If you want me to finish one in particular, go vote. Which ever one gets the most votes, I will continue and finish before I work on the others. When that one is finished, I will put another poll up to decided the next that I work on, and so on.


End file.
